HERMES

we know that wecan’t beyou and me babywe got an impossibilitybecause we have always beenin each otherall alongI cannot ignorethe flashing neon-lit truth I saw in a flasheverything I ever wantedit was a short momentand it looked so smallinsignificantis this whatthe whole fuss was for?and yet it’s coarsea thick knotstuck in my throathard to swallowthat…

Hermes

we know that we can’t be you and me baby we got an impossibility because we have always been in each other all along I cannot ignore the flashing neon-lit truth I saw in a flash everything I ever wanted it was a short moment and it looked so small insignificant is this what the…

just

Much of life is near misses and it’s not like there’s a lot of second chances so letting go and sacrifices are real misses in the end strike outs knowing this time that just passed never returns some days I just can’t see the point of pontificating once again why you gotta act so damn…

The worth of truth

There is a kind of exhaustion that comes with delivery and perfect execution like the hidden fee a service license agreement you have to constantly renew for energy consumed the cost of technology is moving forward into entropy inevitably all systems decay and something new has its day and it turns out the truth is…

The moving parts

You get to a point you can’t track all the moving parts the busy bits the needling pauses the sudden starts a part of your mind tunes out and there it goes spinning on its own out of control like it always was You just detached instead of being the movie you step back and…

The long way back

I will take the long way back the kind you loosen up to because it’s a strenuous journey and there’s a trembling in the pit beneath the sky above the fire deep in my belly I’m the bouncing sound the ricochet between the walls the spitting hiss whizzing by that just missed another inch and…

The Witching Hour

I’ve been going down all the roads I’ve gone before now the miles ride buttery with the new asphalt laid over the toll the wounds took and the surface once broken now seamless yet I remember them well the circles I’ve closed while I hung on a cross sacrificing everything from the years in between…

Life is nothing, if not lived

Don’t take care of your heart that’s nonsense like being attached to the shell as it cracks inevitably breaking your seed sprouts as was intended from inception don’t hold it back let it break and change bold and daring life is nothing, if not lived in its magnificent entirety pain and pleasure the dramas like…

Ordinary hues

I’m a girl on the run weeping at 3AM in the bathroom bleeding from cuts too young trying to warm up beneath the heatless sun of a flickering bulb I walk with monsters camouflaged in scars afraid of the dark the first thing I learned was to contain the suspense of the unknown that made…

On the war on women

Ok, so tell me about how important it is to be me and how I am not some problem to solve and that I’m this unique journey to love but tell me the truth without the pound of makeup four filters on Instagram sporting clad clothes and implants in a flirty perfect selfie pose go…

Pieces of me

I should have been a bloody mangled mess they tell me it’s impossible when they learn what I survived as a kid taught to submit groomed to please they circumsised my anger forcefully left my rage unscabbed blindly wounds are the colors of moods we respond with I became a watercolor maelstrom of mental illness…

The seeming

who is this trapped behind the glass persistently trying to get past an invisible wall of pride who is this who sees through these eyes casting my hooked appetite thoughts caught with a visual net that keeps the construct of sight and insight in a desperate tango dancing in between life and death this impossible…

The way it went

I’ve tried to find shelter in close bonds friends, lovers, family only to find there’s nothing to be found in the ignorance of others’ best intentions I spent years studying intimacy to grasp what’s within and what’s not One day I woke up things wrinkled, things shrunk others grew and this is not how I…

What you saw vs. What you thought

I couldn’t say if you ever really knew me not because of any or all the cliché reasons they say you can’t truly know anyone that you can’t see someone’s heart is a lie we are showing ourselves constantly the key is what was cultivated to make sense of this chaos called everyday life It…

brain shiver

It just takes longer to get throughthe spit and fury of the reeling responsesof a mind trying to come off a habitwithdrawal is a hunger forwhat was there beforenot because it’s betternot because it’s wholebut just because it’s what is knownit’s the way nature tells meI hate changebecause changing shifts everythingyet it’s the one thing…

All of my choices

I’m turning into someoneI barely recognizethose eyes have seen it allshe can’t disguisethat she doesn’t knowit just showsthru the crook in her smiledepths hinted at you can barely fathombut you feel the weight of her wavesas close as a rider breathingwith his horse carrying both I’m polarizing truthfacing down the wavessurfing her displaysthe emotional roller…

corporate geisha

I made myself real smallto learn to breathe with less aircurled myself into in a balllike a fish out of waterI’m learning to sucka little harderin real timeand forgive the edgeits sharpness by acceptingto live with me peacefully inadequacies are the foibles of beinglike the savage qualitythat comes with the full rangeof the trade and…

Dear Social Media,

I have a few words for you today it’s time we had a talk about the way we don’t really see eye to eye or even each other anymore just so you know, I didn’t go under the knife for vanity but to take action in response to the realization I could do something to…

On the process of growing older

I let the young years fret away pained with the complex self-importance my thoughts carried opinions erected in my 20s built as pillars to support they ended up transforming into bars cold and heavy with rigid sets of rules until I met a modern day muse her silences pulled me in a siren of my…

Yeah I know you

it’s the breath that roots in grief the deepest discipline is to not get caught in the politicking of meanings what this label and that name are supposed to be what it meant to know you and all that it stripped away poetry is the grief unconcealed raw and exposed a sprinkle of dictionary and…

The cutting starkness

naked under an open sky you missed me seeing only the appearance of my shape you never realized the flash in my eyes meant it was too late already despite the time the changes the inevitable losses living in a lacquer of hindsight dressing the past tense in colors made of reasons a shiny luster…

The way it went

I’ve tried to find shelter in close bondsfriends, lovers, familyonly to findthere’s nothing to be foundin the ignoranceof others’ best intentionsI spent years studyingintimacyto grasp what’s withinand what’s not One day I woke upthings wrinkled, things shrunkothers grew and this is nothow I imagined livingalive in the gravemost of my lifehas already passed me bywhat…

Saturated and chopped up

Your words are saturated with psychic lesions billions of impressions of a marketing driven global quest for romance the modern day achievement built on some imaginary ideal accompanied by the need all the people who senselessly feed it like cybersex as if you could fill the void with a stranger’s mess used at best like…

Becoming fearless

Speak my fears to the wind may they blow past us you say I attach to this that I enjoy it as I generate the storm caught in between the grit and your mirrored truth thrust in the torn-to-bits whispered chills knots without solutions that can be seen a funeral for the losses all my…

Thaumaturgy

Magic is the stuff that lets you take the ordinary and turn shit to fairy dust the tangled gestating forms an exciting movement opening in the blood that flows through your heart Alchemy’s recipe of giving distills the elixir from lust popping to the beat of your drum my cherry plucked you are the wellspring…

like poetry

the thought of you is a pleasure it’s that scent that has a texture like smooth laughter slick tangling of skin and velveted passions sparring words like swords we strip bare down to the bones of the most intimate truth there’s a sweetness that blossoms in the space torn open in the way we lock…

on experiencing

he asked me if I amheavy companyam I demandingspiritually, intellectuallyI wasn’t surewhat that meansI see throughthe eyes of an almost-queenwhose broken profilepaints the surrealoverlayedlike a Dali of poetrya scorpion shaped venuson a canvas of wordsi referto the obscureliteraryrooted in the dailyordinaryreflections tricklingfrom conversationswith the imaginaryI guess I’m kind of heavyif I only feel intenselyor not…

Pretty much a manual on survival.

Never give up.Even if it meansbeing a stubborn assabout not letting the appearancesof things deceive you.It takes discipline.Ruthless discipline.It’s the only thing that makes you riseout of who you just were. My manual on how to stay alive.After surviving. Years. It’s a messy business. This thriving … means lots of dying partsgive way to new…

Δάφνη

stirred by the breezy whispersof a question blown on the windwhy did you runthe breath gently partingthe leaves of her once hairwhere once life coursedwith a virgin lust throughveins and flesh and cupidshot his arrowslove through his heart he, the Sun godbristled down bare-chestedbold and buckingincandescently wildhis lust unbridledhe sought to pinto his whimthe virgin…

survivor

there’s a mirror that looks back with a face that can’t leave the sadness like a habit that says grace like a priest for the losses you can’t confess anywhere but to the darkness as long as you’re out there but still inside me i can’t let it go i have to release the guilt…

beautiful

it does not just happentill spring’s met winterand the burn of its chillwrenches away every leafof your branchescold as the cold wind blowsthe veneer you believeis youit’s just superficial untesteda pure seeminga childish innocencesmiling and ignorantthen the split of sudden changerends you gut to throatlike you’re a hunted duckplucked rapidly of your featherspreparing to be…