I need your center to crawl away into
A dark warm place inside you
Away from the world
You are the block I chop my anger on
Your bones are my grindstone

Your touch is not a mother’s
Your love is not a father’s
And because of this I hate to love you like I do
And because of this I’m afraid you’ll love me

I am the woman dead twice
Painted in white
Your marrow set in my bones
Death calls to me like a holy origin
Two legs spread tear asunder the impostor
A virgin who lay in my place
The animal in me knows
I’m not quite ready to emerge
To return to power
As I get close so close
The pain of control
I spread open
And because of this I hate to love you like I do
Your marrow in my bones
And because of this I’m afraid you’ll love me too

Tear asunder the impostor
Who beat me out of my place
Tore off my face
Lost me in a maze

Find me a way out
Rid me of this viral parasite
Contracted need
Plant a human seed to seek
Divinity
Your breath in my soul
Surrender the illusion of control

Your touch is not a mother’s
Your love is not a father’s
And because of this I hate to love you like I do
And because of this I’m afraid you’ll love me too

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